Freedom From Dieting


“Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes.” Luke 12:23, NIV

Have you ever had one of those days where if you could just get the kids in bed for nap, or bed, then you would be o.k.? Have you ever had this thought, “I am going to get the kids in bed, and then I am going to get my chocolate out of the cabinet, and relax”? This is my confession. Even when I was on Weight Watcher’s, I would reserve enough points for my “de-stressing” chocolate.

I have struggled with my weight for as long as I can remember. Having kids only enhanced the struggle, but I can not blame them for my extra girth. ( as Dena from Faith lifts so delicately put it!) I have always eaten my stress, my joy, my anger, my disappointment, you get the picture.

But then something changed. Suddenly I didn’t just not like the way I looked, I didn’t like me anymore. I didn’t like my insecurity, my emotional roller coasters, and my anger towards so many. I didn’t like the way I was treating my husband, and the undue pressure I put on him to make me happy, an expectation he would never be able to live up to. When we sought some counsel, my pastor told me “Angel, girl, you have got to find your own validation outside of Ben”. It was at that moment that I began to realize what I had done to him. I began to say to myself, life has got to be more than this!

I have begun a journey, one that has involved examining what has caused me to loose the love I had for people, and life, and one that requires me to forsake the comfort of chocolate. I have had to forgive, and let go, I have had to accept the things in my life that were my fault, and let go of the things that were not. I had to let go of the victim mentality, and realize that it doesn’t matter what has happened in my childhood or adulthood. Dwelling on those things will not make the present easier or better.

I have begun to realize that eating healthy and exercising is not just about getting into a smaller size, but also about being healthy enough to do what God has called me to. To have the energy to keep up with my kids, and one day my grandkids. To have the health to stick around to grow old with my husband. To feel good about myself and fight the depression that laziness and stress eating enhances.

One of my greatest inspirations is Katrina Little, who lost 150 pounds and lives out the message of “Freedom From Dieting”. No Pills, No Diet plans, but letting God show her the way to live the way He intended, and learning to love herself in the process. She is now a mentor to me and has already helped me in ways she will never know.

Marla Ciley and Leanne Ely have written a great book called “Body Clutter”, I got it for Christmas and devoured it in 2 weeks. They compare the weight to clutter, it is an outward manifestation of the clutter in your mind and heart. And we all know you can not organize clutter or learn to deal with it in a healthy lifestyle, you can only get rid of it!

I have not reached the finish line, I have only now started the race. But just to know I have what it takes to run the course is, for now, enough for me!

Angel

Steps to Self Love!


“The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely” ~Carl Jung

I read Kammie’s Post, 7 Sassy Steps to Self Loving You, and was inspired. She says, “What one thing could you commit to doing each day that showed YOU – you’re crazy about you? Pick one daily self-loving habit and stick to it. It reinforces to your subconscious that above all the other responsibilities and distractions in your life, you put yourself first.”

In Jill Koenig’s New Year New Life C.D., she says that in whatever goal you have the key is to do something everyday, no matter how small, do something every day towards that goal. It is about consistency more than doing big things sporatically.

I think that learning to change your stinking thinking about yourself is a great goal to begin with. If we can everyday do something for ourselves to prove to ourself that we think we are special, in the end we will reach any goal we want to. Because well, we will think we are worth anything we want.

Angel

Bringing Order to Your Child’s Toys/Rooms

Our brain compartmentalizes like a computer or filing cabinet. If there is clutter everywhere our brain short circuits because it can not compartmentalize chaos. One of the first things a psychologist told my mom that my ADD brother needed was order, and structure. While there are so many things I could say on this subject, I will say that helping your children learn to have order in their life will do more than just keep your home neat and tidy. Today I would like to share some tips on how to help them keep order in the first place every child needs it, with their toys!

Getting your children to clean their rooms, or keep them clean is not as difficult as it seems. I began with Emily from about one year of age teaching her how to put things away. At this age they are so eager to help and learn new things that they will do anything you encourage them to do. Right now I am working with Anna, almost two. With these ages the picking up after themselves is more about you guiding them, literally walking them to the toy asking them to pick it up, taking them to the place where it goes and asking them to put it there. You could have done it faster yourself, but you would not have helped them to learn how to do it. Plus, it is a self esteem builder for the toddler to do something that they feel has been a help to mommy. Of course the praise they get encourages them to do it again. As she gets the “game,” I move on to sitting on the floor and asking her to go get an item and “show mommy where it goes.” I am slowly teaching her to do it herself. Anna loves it, and so did Emily. Emily at five, and even when she was 3 and 4, is great at being able to pick things up. She typically knows where everything goes, better than daddy when he has to help her pick up.

With Emily, I obviously can catch a little more guff than with Anna; Emily has figured out this “game” is not as much fun as it used to be. So I try to make things a little easier for her. Just as we should break down our chores into smaller increments, try doing so with them as well. Here are a few ways:

1- If they are just free playing, every once in awhile pop your head in and ask them to stop and only pick up one thing. “Just pick up all the Barbies, and throw them all in the suit case.” (This is where the Barbies are kept in my house) There may be 15 different things on the floor, don’t worry about that. If they do that one thing, (And things like Barbies with A lot of pieces is an excellent “1 thing”) they have eliminated 1 thing later to worry about. If you give them this one small goal, and then they know they can go back to playing they will do it quickly. If you do this about every 30-45 minutes, you will find most everything eliminated, and clean up time is not so daunting.

2- Have family clean up time periodically throughout the day, before lunch, before nap/down time, and before dinner or bedtime. Know when these times are coming and give them ample time to accomplish them. Family clean up time can be both, or all of you cleaning up their room together, if they are young; or as they get older you set a clean up goal for yourself, while they have clean up goals too. I read one article, where the mother home-schooled four children. She said they would have projects everywhere, all over the table, etc. But no matter what they were doing they stop at a certain time and clean it up. She will begin dinner, and they will begin clean up time. When her husband comes home, the table is clear, and the smell of dinner fills the house. It is such an inviting place to come into. If your children are smaller, then do it with them about 20 minutes before or in between cooking dinner.

3- I have said this before, Set a timer! Emily is very motivated by this. Right now she can’t quite tell time, so as my sister says it is like the ticking bomb, you never know when it is going to go off. However, I know this works for me and my own chores.

4- Use the basket method. The hardest thing for me is not the toys all over the bedroom, it is the toys all over the house. I can’t vacuum, mop, or get anything accomplished for all the toys! My solution: I got a bucket, or laundry basket, that is solely used for stray items in the house. As part of our “pick one thing up” drill, I will say “pick up as many toys throughout the living room and dining room as you can, until the bucket is filled”. Then I will either put them away myself, if I am not in the “training” mood that day, or I will leave it in their room for them to empty later.

5- Of course the number one way to keep things organized is to declutter. In my post about “Holiday Clutter Stress”, I gave some tips on how to get rid of the clutter. As Flylady says, “You cannot organize clutter, you can only get rid of it!”
Angel

The Greatest Miracles!

Over Christmas break I took Emily, my daughter, to see “Charlotte’s Web”. I must confess that I have never really read the book to completion. (If you have not already seen the movie, you must. I will probably own it as soon as I can.) In the movie the mother is concerned about Fern, her daughter. She is worried that she spends too much time with the animals. So she keeps questioning her doctor about it. When Charlotte begins spinning her web to read “SOME PIG” everyone thinks it is a miracle. Everyone it is, except Fern’s mother. She is convinced Fern has something to do with it. Now I must ask here, how could she possibly think that this little girl could handle such a delicate web and break it apart to spell words, and then put it back together again? The point here is that she could not believe, there had to be an explanation. What the doctor said has stuck with me…He asked “Do you not believe in miracles? Is not the spider’s web itself a miracle? This spider creates this haven for himself, a tool to capture his food, so delicate yet so resilient. No one taught it how to make it, it just makes it. Is this not a miracle?” If you have read the book you know that one of the lessons is to see the ordinary miracles that surround us.

I believe to see miracles. I want to see the miracles of Jesus. Dead raised, the lame walking, blind seeing. I do not want to live my life without seeing them. While I believe I will see them, God is every day building my faith in the miracles we over look. When someone faces tragic loss, and yet their heart is soft and joy comes back to their face, that is a miracle. When a child is born with all of the intricate detail that the human body encompasses, that is a miracle. When a child learns to walk or talk, that is a miracle. When someone who has been given every disadvantage in life, and yet is a success, that is a miracle. When you find love and laughter with a stranger and then create a friend, that is a miracle. When a spider spins it’s web, even without beautiful words, that is a miracle.

It is hard to see the pain on others from tragic loss, or who have just been beat up by life. It is hard to even understand why God has allowed it in the first place. Jesus said we would do these and greater things than He did, so why aren’t we seeing them? I do not know.

What I do know is that miracles surround us everyday, and like Fern’s mother, even when they are right in your face, some will choose to rationalize it away.

Maybe the greatest miracles are not the ones that are so apparent. Maybe the greatest miracles are the “ordinary” ones that we overlook everyday. Salvation, Love, Acceptance, and Forgiveness! The healing of a broken heart, the lifted head from defeat, friendship, family, and the strength we lend to those we love to face another day. That is a Miracle!

Angel

Dance with Your Kids!

My favorite distraction in the evenings for my kids is to turn on a C.D. and dance around the kitchen with them while I am cooking dinner. So, I decided to make a C.D. for Emily, with all of these upbeat songs that we could dance around to. Some Christian songs we both like, Sesame Street versions of hit songs I like. (If you have ever watched Sesame Street you know how people like Melissa Etheridge, and Goo Goo Dolls come on and take their hit songs and “Sesame Street” them up. It’s great.) Anyway, she came to me and said how much the songs made her happy. She said when she feels bad she can play this c.d. and “get happy like mommy”. Then she said “Thank you mommy, every time I listen to this I will remember how my mommy made this just for me, and that mommy loves me.” All I was trying to do was find music she could play that I could enjoy too, and instead it turned into a great “mommy and me” moment.

So, a great activity is to create a C.D. for, or with, your kids that you can both enjoy together. Then get crazy silly with them, and dance all over your house. It is great exercise, and the kids love it! No matter what age your kids are, you can find songs you will both enjoy. Have Fun with it, your kids are great entertainment!

Angel

Journey’s With Kelly … Prayer is Part of the Journey

Journeys With KellyThis month I had a plan as to the direction of this column. It was all “plotted” out since I would have my hands full with our newest family member. I have tried to sit down and put it in order. It just has not happened. I think the Lord just wants me to speak from my heart and get back to the “nuts and bolts” of adoption next month.

After discussing when to adopt, I want to tell you a bit about the 2 private domestic adoptions we have successfully completed. When our first child, Zach , came into our lives it took us in like a whirlwind. I knew the moment we received a message on our answering machine that this little boy was the one God had for us. Zach has been the firecracker in our lives from the start. We went from being a 2 person family to a 3 person family in 60 days. He was an answer to prayer and every time I look at him I know that God remembers. Zachary David means: God remembers His beloved. God wanted me to know that He always hears my prayers.
When you begin your adoption journey bathe it in prayer. Pray over your child as if you were carrying it in your own belly. Zach is living proof that praying over him before I even knew about him kept him safe. His birth mom used drugs and smoked during her pregnancy. He was a smaller baby, but other than that he was healthy. That is God’s protection. God heard the prayers of this mother and answered.

Another “little thing” God did just for me during the time of Zach adoption is…..I had desperately asked God to have a child by the time I was 30 years old. My birthday came and went and no baby was even on the horizon. I dealt with the emotion of that and moved on in life. When I spoke with the birth mom’s doctor he confirmed that Zach had indeed been conceived sometime in late April or early May. Guess when my birthday is….May 8. Yes, God hears the prayers of an adoptive mom’s heart.

Now our sweet Gabe came as more of a surprise. We had been focusing our efforts and prayers on a toddler age child. Our other son that we are trying to bring home is now 7, so we felt that a toddler would fit better into our family structure. God had another idea and let us know very clearly that Gabe’s destiny was with The Krause House. We had no idea that we would have another newborn to bring home and what a wonderful blessing he has been. We had prayed that God would send the right child into our home whose destiny we could help to fulfill. The moment surrounding finding out about Gabe was such a God moment that it is hard to describe. It was another one of those….I just knew it moments. We were off on another fast track to adoption of our 3rd son. We were able to hold little Gabe in our arms in just 4 months at the tender age of 2 hours old. God is so good to listen to our prayers. Gabe fits perfectly into our family and is exactly what we all needed. God hears our prayers despite what we ask for in life. He takes our prayers and hears what we really need.

To wrap this up…I think what I’d like to say is that prayer for your children is the most important thing that you can do for them. Regardless of the circumstances of where you are in your adoption process. God has blessed us with 2 quick domestic adoptions. Both have been not been the average wait. Each adoption was very different. Our actual 2nd adoption is still in process and has/is taking much prayer and patience on this mom’s part. I’ll share about that one some day.

In the mean time…Take a prayer journey for your child whether you know where they are or not. God hears the prayers of a mother’s heart. He’ll send an angel to watch over each and every child. He always has mine.

Blessings on your journey.

The Journey Continues ... Kelly

5 Things You Do Not Know About Me!

I have been tagged again. My friend Kim, over at Kim and Jason Has tagged me for the “5 things you do not know about me” So I get to share 5 things you do not know about me, and then tag a few other people. So Here goes.

1- The first time I met my husband I was not interested, but a friend of mine was. (You know who you are! ;)) I said, “Go for it Girl!”

2- I am a PK, Preacher’s Kid that is! Seriously thought about forming a support group, “PKA – Preacher’s Kids Anonymous”. HEE HEE!

3- I have been a dancer, an actor, and a…MIME! Yep! White face and everything. I even went to school for it.

4- I was engaged once before I met Ben, didn’t get a ring though. Dang It!

5- I lived in California for 3 months. Arts School (as in Dance, Acting, and MIME! I kid you not!)

O.K., Who to Tag… Wendy Piersall at emoms@home, Tracy hurst at TracyHurst.com, BlondeMomBlog, the two genius’ over at Rookie Moms, and Jill Koenig, THE goal guru!

Thanks for the fun Kim, I can’t wait to see what everyone comes up with!

Angel