As all moms, I am a very busy one. It doesn’t seem to matter whether you work outside of the home or not. While I am a stay at home mom, my sister has worked a full time job for the last 3 years. She would always roll her eyes when I would say how overwhelmed I felt by all I had to do. I mean, she had to do all I had to do and work a full time job right?
She quit her job about 6 weeks ago, and I have laughed ever since. It seems that there is not as much time as she thought there was going to be. But how can that be? Doesn’t she still have the same amount of children, the same house to clean, and the same errands to run, and without a full time job? Yes, she does. However, now she has time to go work out, but that is time out of her day she didn’t use to do. Now, she can volunteer to do more for her daughter’s class and be at the activites at the school, all of them! Something she didn’t do before. Now, my mother calls her when she needs something done, instead of me, because surely Jo Anna has time now that she does not work. And then the worst time eater is putting things off because we have plenty of time to do them. Does this sound familiar?
The point is while most all that now fills my sister’s time is more of a pleasure, working out, being able to be there for her daughter’s special things, etc., she is still a very busy mom. We have both learned very quickly that if you do not establish your priorities, someone else will establish them for you.
It is in the day to day things that we become overwhelmed, take on too much, or waste time doing nothing. Yet,it is the day to day things that reveal your priorities, create patterns in our life, and that your children will remember most.
We must remember to make every minute count, because how we spend our days is how we spend our life. But how do we do this? Here are a few tips I have found.
1- Learn to say no. Even though it may be good to do, you have to ask yourself “is this the BEST way to spend my time?”.
2- Avoid Procrastinating. Make idle time useful. My “time-eater” is the television. I am so guilty of spending my children’s nap time in front of the television and zoning out. Then when they are awake I need to clean, and fold laundry and all the things that take away from being with them. I have to consciously restrict myself, so that I am making use of my time. I love Flylady’s philosophy, she uses 5, 10, and 15 minute increments to do everything. Anyone can find time in between different activities to do a little here and there, freeing your time later.
3- Decide what IS important, and let nothing steal that from you. Spending time with your children, spending time with yourself, time with God, whatever it is that is important to you, make a conscious effort everyday to take a step towards that thing. Otherwise, you will find at the end of the day, the greatest things were sacrificed for the good thing.
Years ago when my first son was born we lived in a tiny apartment that was an easy clean and little maintenance. From there we moved into a 2000 sq.ft. home that was not an easy clean. I still kept my priorities and I have rarely faltered from them. My kids always came first. I vowed not to miss that frog on the lawn or enjoy a walk in the sunshine. I stayed home to be a mom. Cleaning your house and doing errands are a by product of life. It needs to be done, but it will be there. Your children are only this age one time. Enjoy them. So yes, get your stuff done while they nap. It is important. But, oh, just wait until they don’t nap anymore. Then you have dance and soccer and you still have to look surprised when they reach level 29 in a video game for the 5th time. Smile. Being a mom is great. Don’t sweat the small stuff. It will be there tomorrow. It’s worth skipping it to see your child’s eyes light up because mom will turn a cartwheel on the lawn with them.
Aw, I really enjoyed the Christmas pictures you put up.
The reality is the grass is always greener on the other side. You simply can’t appreciate what you haven’t experienced. ;o) I also think that you have to decide what things are most important to you because the one who tries to do everything ends up feeling like a miserable failure. We weren’t meant to do it all, we have to recognize times and seasons and adjust our energies accordingly, lest we run faster than we have strength. ;o)
Hugs,
Holly
Holly’s Corner
I work 3 days a week and I feel like the other 4 are crammed with so much crap to do! I really want to spend my extra time with my 15 month old son but I am always always being pulled in other directions. I really need to work on telling people no. They just assume that since I am not working that I have all the time in the world to do stuff for them! It can be so frustrating!
Thanks for the advice.
This is such a great post. After I had my second daughter in March 2004 I quit the board position I had with a local professional group (which was difficult for me to do without feeling guilty as I had been involved with them for YEARS and had served as president.) I also cut back to four days a week in the office. It is so important to just “say no.” I’m not doing any volunteer work right now either and used to do some with Junior Achievement.
Any way, I’m trying to be more organized this year and “declutter” my home and my schedule!
p.s. my big time eater is blogging…can you tell? 😉 But hey I just scrubbed our tub/shower while my 4-year-old is watching a movie.