“Don’t defend yourself, your friends don’t need it, and your enemies won’t believe it” (Author Unknown…At least to me. 🙂 )
I know the above quote to be so true. I have seen it so many times in my life. But my nature can not help but pack my arsenal full when I feel I, or someone I love, is being attacked. I often relate to David who would let God “have it” when he felt like he was not standing up for him.
Please get up—wake up! Tend to my case. My God, my Lord—my life is on the line. Do what you think is right, God, my God, but don’t make me pay for their good time. Don’t let them say to themselves, “Ha-ha, we got what we wanted.” Don’t let them say, “We’ve chewed him up and spit him out.” Let those who are being hilarious at my expense Be made to look ridiculous. Make them wear donkey’s ears; Pin them with the donkey’s tail, who made themselves so high and mighty! (Psalm 35:23-25 TM)
David and Peter and I would have probably gotten a long well. “Let’s just kill them and tell God they died” has often been our stand, but when the opportunity presented itself to David to kill his greatest enemy Saul he knew that taking matters into his own hands was not the answer. The love and trust of God’s love stops the need to vindicate yourself. David knew as well as I that ” the LORD will vindicate his people and have compassion on his servants.” (Psalm 135:14 NIV)
One of my dad’s and my constant arguments as I was growing up between us would go something like this: “Dad that is not fair!!!!!!” And my dad would respond with “Baby, one day you are going to learn… Life is not fair”. Ugggh! I hated to hear that. I thought everything should be fair in the world, and if God were God he would do that. Right??
Well, God is not a fair God but He is just. Romans 8:28 (TM) says “He knows us far better than we know ourselves…That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.” We can’t always know why life seems unfair. Why it seems slanderous words and hurtful circumstances seem to go unanswered by God, why good men fail and the good die young. Yet we can trust that He has a plan and will work it all out for our good!
I often feel like Jim Carey in Bruce Almighty, when he finally yields to God’s will he gets hit by a Big Mac Truck! I mean come on, can you win for losing?! Then suddenly he is standing in God’s presence, the heart motives are revealed and then he is sucker punched again. Has he not learned his lesson already? Yes, the sucker punch, though it hurts, is actually life!
Here is my point, many times life will not make sense, and we will more times than not NOT understand God. We will feel the desire to defend, fight, and let everyone know what is right and wrong. But it won’t change people’s opinions, it won’t make us feel better, it won’t make God move. But when we trust God, He will vindicate us, and we will find ourseves on our feet again.
I am blown away by your post. I could’ve written it myself. Just this past week my middle daughter (a sophmore in high school) had a terrible experience with her supposed BFF’s!
They had been doing little things to hurt her for a while…but the final blow was heartbreaking!
They broke up their friendship with her claiming that she had made fat jokes about them. She also had problems hurting them repeatedly with her mean comments to them.
Now….first…these girls are bullies! They both say the meanest things to her and everyone. Each of them continually make fat jokes about each other and other big people their size.
It broke my daughter’s heart. When she tried to reconcile with them….they were relentless and unforgiving (even though there was no truth to the claims!).
It was a real eyeopener for her.
You are so right……you cannot change anyone’s mind….don’t even defend yourself. Just apologize and move on. The choice to sin now belongs to the other person.
Way to go Angel! Maybe in 2009 we can all walk this out together. You’re starting to get it. It’s not about anyone else, but you and God. He will take care of the rest.:)
I Love You!