Worry, Worry, Worry!

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:25-34

I know we have read this scripture before. If you read my site regularly then you have read it here before, but nonetheless it is a scripture worth repeating over and over. Why? Because as women we tend to worry about everything. As someone once pointed out to me “If I decide not to worry, I start worrying about not worrying. I worry that if I do not think about the problem, worry about it, and try to find a solution the matter will just get worse. So I worry.”

How many of us have actually been able to say that worrying has resolved a problem, or conflict? None most likely. In most cases my worrying has made things worse. Worry and Fear are so close you can not tell them apart. Fear and worry allows negative thoughts to run through our mind until we are irrationally responding to a matter, and actually making them worse. Fear and worry never tell us that things will work out, or that tomorrow will be a better day.

While worrying can not resolve a matter, it can steal your quality of life. It can cause you to not enjoy the things that are good in your life. Jesus asked “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?”, the truth is worrying can’t add to your life, but it can cause anxiety leading to other health issues, actually stealing from your life.

You may be saying to yourself, “Well, I don’t want to worry but I have always worried about something and don’t know how to stop.” Worry is a choice, one which we all battle with, but I believe we can control it. It is not always easy, like a bad habit, and with some almost as hard as an addiction to break. There is a form of Therapy call Cognitive Therapy. In a nutshell, the Dr. helps you retrain your thinking. It specifically works with depression. The concept is that certain thought patterns not only lead to depression, but fuel it as well. Changing the thought patterns can actually change your outlook on life, healing depression. While some call this a novel concept, cutting edge in therapy and psychology, I say it has been around for at least thousands of years. The Apostle Paul said “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.” (Romans 12:2) All through David’s Psalms he demonstrated this therapy. Even when he was depressed, in times when it seemed that all defeat was inevitable he would sing “I will be glad and rejoice in thy mercy: for thou hast considered my trouble; thou hast known my soul in adversities; And my soul shall be joyful in the LORD: it shall rejoice in his salvation.”(Palms 31:7, 35:9) He made a choice to rejoice and be thankful.

The good news is that we can choose our thoughts, and choose to meditate and focus on what is good. And according to the word, if we change our thinking, and refuse to worry about what we can not control, we will find peace.
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me–put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. (Phil. 4:8-9)

Taking Time For The Two Of You.

I am back from an excellent weekend, celebrating my anniversary with my hubby. 🙂 We were able to reconnect, and just be a couple. That can be so important sometimes. To remember the identity you share as a couple. Not as a mom and dad, but as a couple. Remembering that, at one time, you were together and in love for a reason other than the kids.

We slept in late (By force, my body woke me up at 5:00 am and I told it to go back to sleep 🙂 ) and putted around at one of the local festivals in town. We enjoyed the historic area, and did much of nothing except to enjoy each others company.

I have to admit, my husband had to push me out the door to go. I wanted to spend our money more practically, but he insisted that sometimes we just have to live our life. I am grateful to him for pushing me and making me go.

One of the things we did together while alone was read a book we have had for quite sometime. We took the weekend to read The DNA of Relationships by Dr. Gary and Michael Smalley.What better time to focus on our relationship than on our anniversary.

We firmly believe in renewing our relationship, and finding new ways to love each other. Taking the time to read a book on relationships or going to a conference for couples, or a class at your church doesn’t have to be only when your marriage is in trouble. In fact we view it as “preventive maintenance”. We have been to counselors when we have had issues in our marriage we just could not seem to work through in our lives, ( Counseling does not only have to be when you are on the brink of divorce. ) but we also attempt to be proactive to make our marriage better. I don’t want a mediocre marriage, I want a great marriage.

I know, maybe you have heard it all before, maybe you know all there is to know about having a good marriage. But sometimes we need to hear things to refresh ourselves. Repetition is good for the memory, it keeps it in the forefront of our mind. It is also a good way to show your spouse that they are important enough for the investment. It opens dialogue to discuss things that may be important but never the right time to talk about.

If you don’t have time to read a book, or go to a conference or class at church, maybe start with something small. For example, Michael Smalley has a blog, CrashIntoLove.com . You can read it, and he can read it. Take the time once a week and talk about your favorite post. You do not even have to read them together, it just gives you topics to discuss and to create dialogue about your relationship. How do you agree or disagree, what do you each value?

If you have never done anything like this before, it may seem awkward at first, but you will find it so exciting as you reconnect with each other and make your relationship a priority.

Now I will make a plug here (Nothing in it for me) : If you are in the Atlanta area, my home church is having a marriage conference on the DNA of Relationships. Check it out by visiting trinitychapel.org . I will be there, and I hope you can be too.

Fun Friday!

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Happy Anniversary to us, Happy Anniversary to us, Happy Anniversary to uuuuuuus! Happy Anniversary to Us!

Today marks five years For Ben and I. I can not believe we have made it this far. Thank you baby, for riding this roller coaster with me. Through the ups and downs, you have been the consistent rock in my life. I love you so much for the father, husband, and the man you are. Always supportive, always loving, always there. You stand beside me! Not over me, behind me, or in front of me, but beside me. Partners and friends, thank you for loving me for who I am, and encouraging me to be all that I can be. With all my love, Happy Anniversary! Here is to another 5, and 55 years.

Fun Friday…Sort of.

My husband is very much into politics. He loves to watch and listen to debates and such. He can listen to it and not get riled up, I on the other hand can be caught fussing at the television like they can hear me. 🙂

I just want to know who holds the same moral values as me and let’s go with that one. I do not like using my down time listening to a bunch of men argue.(and now women 😉 ) However, I am very patriotic, and love my country. I vote because I can. A woman less than a hundred years ago could not, and I do not take that for granted.

My friend, Shalom, sent this link to me and I really appreciated it. It really helped me quickly narrow down the candidates I would most likely vote for. You simply answer a few questions concerning political issues and it tells you the candidates that agree and disagree with your opinions. You can quickly see who agrees with your beliefs more. So whether you are not politically savvy, or you love discussing politics, this will be helpful. It is non-partisan. It is only to help you better know what your candidates are thinking and saying on the issues.

Click here to Select a Candidate.

Man Bashing

I choose to speak and believe and expect that men can be great! I choose to hold up the icons of Lancelot, of Charles Ingalls, of William Wallace, of John Walton! I choose to believe that Adam and Eve were created side-by-side; he cherishing and loving her, and her honoring and respecting him.…I know, I know…it doesn’t always work out that way. Because the reality is, in this world, men have the power…Biblically speaking, that power works beautifully for both men and women: “husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church,” and “women, give your husbands the honor that they are due.” So women are to honor their husbands as they would Jesus: serving, loving, praising, respecting, submitting to the authority of. (I know, as a part of current American culture, you are choking on the word “submit”…but stick with me here!) And men are supposed to love their wives as Christ loved the church: as an absolutely self-less, servant-leader…giving, serving, loving, protecting, even unto horrific suffering and death. Terri Miller Reality Parents

Today I visited Reality Parents. Terri was writing about man bashing, and the effects it has on your marriage. It seems funny, and it seems harmless, but how much does it really effect not only our perception of or husbands, but what they emulate? I personally do not appreciate the jokes some have sent to my husband about nagging wives, and silly women. So why is it o.k. to see and say equally as demeaning things about our husbands? I am not throwing stones, because my glass house would come tumbling in on me, but I am saying that I was convicted by this. The marriage should be a sacred place. The home should be where every member of the family is accepted and honored.

Sometimes as we begin to feel the conviction of what we say or think about our husbands we tend to defend it by what they say and think about us. I liked Terri’s point here: “Even as we strive to restore our men to a place of honor and respect, there will be exceptions. There always are. “There’s nothing like a mother’s love,” right? But sometimes a mother drowns her own children, or beats them, or leaves them locked in a basement to die. These are the exceptions, and we don’t need to outlaw basements because of them. Well, there are going to be men that we try to respect, that we strive to honor…and they are going to misuse their power, and they are going to be jerks. But let’s not throw the baby out with the bathwater.” So while they are not perfect and never will be, neither are we.

Here is my bottom line. I can ramble on about my husband’s shortcomings, like mine, 🙁 they are there. However, I can equally rant on and on about what a wonderful husband and father he is. Yet, by human nature we tend to point out the worst rather than the best. Why is that? I can tell you that he rarely, if ever, points out the things in me that disqualifies me as “Wife of The Year”. Yet, I tend to find the things that need to be improved upon in our marriage instead of enjoying the good things.

This weekend is our anniversary, and I will take the time to tell him what he means to me. What I love about him, and how much I honor and respect him. It doesn’t have to be a special occasion, though, to remind your spouse what you love about them. So, I follow in Terri’s suit to let him know He is indeed my Knight in Shining Armor. To see the things I love about him, more than the things I would like to change.

Read Terri’s Full article by clicking here. It is worth the read.

Shrimp Pasta in 15 minutes

Recipe for Shrimp Pasta:

    1/2 – 1lb Shrimp
    1lb Pasta
    1 stick butter
    1 diced onion
    1 seasoning packet Italian Dressing


For a thicker creamier sauce add:

    1/2 to 1 cup Half and Half
    Parmesan cheese to taste.

Directions:

    Cook Pasta.
    While Pasta is cooking… Melt Butter in a pan, add Italian seasoning, and onions, saute’ for a moment.
    Add Shrimp
    When shrimp is cooked add half and half , simmer one minute, remove from heat.
    Toss the sauce mixture in with the pasta, add Parmesan to taste (optional)
    Serve!

Five Tips to Organize Your Child’s Craft Gear

By Aby Garvey

I hope you’re enjoying all the pleasures of fall…changing leaves, cooler temperatures, and the chance to get back outdoors and enjoy it all. The kids are back in school, which means it’s time to do some organizing! And if your kids are anything like mine…organizing all their gear is a necessary project this time of year. “Where did all this stuff come from?” I often wonder as I gaze into their rooms.
From the very first time I stepped foot in a baby super center until now, I’m still amazed at how much stuff little people come with. From the bibs, bouncy seats, bottles and binkies of babyhood, to the tchotchkes of childhood and the treasures of the teen years, raising a kid these days means you’re dealing with stuff…and lots of it! If you’re just about at your wits end with all your kids’ stuff, then you’ve come to the right place. At simplify 101 this week, it’s all about the kids and all their stuff. Here are some great things to add to your to-do list to make getting your little people and all their stuff organized…so you can get back to the fall festivities.

If you love to create and make things, it stands to reason you’d like to share the joy of creative pursuits with your children. Sometimes, though, dealing with all the Play-Doh, crayons, markers, paper, glitter, glue and all the glue-able stuff, can leave even the most creative of souls feeling nothing short of stifled. But with a few simple organizing and storage strategies up your sleeve, organizing your child’s craft gear will be as fun as child’s play.

Tip #1: Establish a spot (or spots) for creative play. The basement, garage, or even the kitchen table can all work well. The ideal location will allow your child to create with near-reckless abandon without you being worried that something will get, well, wrecked. If you’re investing in a new table for crafting, look for a cleanable surface. Or make an existing table wipe-able with an inexpensive vinyl table cloth.

Setting up craft central in a centralized area of your home, such as the kitchen, will encourage more creative play. Keeping craft supplies close to the hub of creativity makes it a much more natural part of your life. In my home, for example, messy crafts take place in the basement (or even the driveway or patio on a warm and sunny day); and the less-messy crafts (from coloring to gluing) take place at the kitchen table. By keeping a core set of supplies in the kitchen, the kids can pull out craft supplies while I’m cooking dinner.

Tip #2: Respect the boundaries. While crafting feels as if it should be a boundless activity, it’s easier to use and enjoy your items when your collection fits comfortably into it’s allocated space. Craft supplies are no different. But here’s the upside: craft supplies get used up! So if you don’t have room for googley eyes and pipe cleaners today, add those items as soon as your child uses up some feathers and foam shapes.

Tip #3. Employ strategic solutions. Store items as near to where you’ll be creating as possible. Or use portable storage to easily move items to a secondary crafting location like the driveway or patio. Our paint supplies are corralled into a handled basket making it simple to spend the afternoon painting on the patio.

Divide your child’s craft items into two categories: “help yourself” and “let’s play together.” The “help yourself” items are craft supplies you’d be perfectly happy having your child use on his or her own. This category is age-and child-dependent. For example, it may not be a good idea to give a two-year old free access to paint and glitter…but an eight-year old could be a completely different story.

Keep the “help yourself” items at your child’s eye level and in-his reach. “Let’s play together” items are stowed in out of reach locations like on top of the refrigerator, or on a high shelf in a closet, cabinet or pantry.

Tip #4. Employ creative storage solutions.
Creative pursuits deserve creative containers. Here’s a list of some of my favorites…

Plastic drawers. Dress up basic plastic drawers with cardstock or rub-on letters. Add a ribbon to the drawer handle to add a splash of color.

Clipboards or lap-desks. A portable creation station like a lap desk or clip board makes it easy to take creative pursuits anywhere your little one wants to go.

Office supply paper stacking trays. Keep paper tidy and put vertical space to good use.

Magazine file boxes. Great for storing old magazines your child can cut up, as well as coloring books, notebooks or even extra paper.

Over the door storage pockets. A standard over the door shoe organizer is great for corralling basic craft supplies like paintbrushes, makers, crayons and tape. Label the shoe holder, so you know what’s where, using laminated cards, safety pins and ribbon.

Tip #5. Celebrate creative endeavors. Display your child’s finished works of art throughout your home. Use acrylic box frames for an easily changeable display. Or hang a simple bulletin board or magnetic board to display the latest masterpiece. Once a new work of art is created, change out your display and store favorite art pieces permanently in a three-ring binder or artwork box.

Aby Garvey is a professional organizer and the owner of simplify 101, inc. Her mission is to help you create time and space for what matters most in your home and life. Aby is the author of the e-book “the happy scrapper – simple solutions to get organized and get scrapping!” Visit the simplify 101 website for organizing ideas and to subscribe to Aby’s organizing email newsletter.

Cyber Shower Party Post

Today is a little out of the ordinary. I did not get to make a “Fun Friday” post, so I am going to do it today instead. Five Minutes For Mom (hosted by two sisters) are both having babies. One is already here, the other is a couple of weeks away. So they are having a “Cyber Shower” and have invited us to play the games. The first, and most embarrassing of all games, is to post a picture of yourself in delivery. The picture here is the first time I saw Anna. I barely remember it as I was very drugged. After nearly 24 hours of labor, and she had not dropped at all, I had a c-section. So here it is, see my eyes how glazed and tired I was. (You need to feel sorry for me, the more pathetic I look the better chance I have of winning. 😉 )

The first Time I saw Anna…

Healthy Lunches

Last week I talked about the importance of healthy lunches. I told you about some of the harmful things in the marketed “healthy” items for kids, and some alternatives. This week, I wanted to share some more practical tips on how to prepare healthy lunches.

  • Sneak in fresh vegetables and fruits. While your child may leave a whole apple untouched, she may love cut up grapes in her chicken salad. (Click here for a great Chicken Salad recipe with grapes.)
  • Get creative: Use cookie cutters to carve sandwiches into fun shapes. Use a cool sports bottle for their water, or splurge $2 a week for the little aquapod fun shaped water bottles. 
  • Prep lunches with leftovers from dinner the night before. (We discussed this one last week) It is fast, easy, and it is cost effective.
  • Don’t be afraid of things that seem “snacky”. For instance, Peanut butter crackers can be healthy. The benefits of all natural Peanut butter is fabulous. Protein, and fiber, and all the benefits of nuts. Cheese cubes, carrots and grape tomatoes with ranch dressing. All great snacks, and lunch items! 
  • Indulge in desserts, but don’t go overboard. Total overkill on “health” food can cause an uprising. So every once in awhile treat them a little.
  • Choose to introduce new things, and reinforce the things they do not love, at home rather than school. Example: Emily will not drink her water at school. So, I send the fruit water, or watered down juice, occasionally some Splenda/Decaffeinated tea. This is part of “the deal” I have with her that at dinner she must drink water. For us it is even if we drink tea, because I drink water all day, but for some you may have to drink water as well for the example.

Pasta with Goat Cheese and Roasted Asparagus

Nili Kosterman sent this recipe to me She said:

“Made this for dinner tonight…yummy yummy good, I also added crumbled bacon to the bowls right before I served it. Comes from Everyday Food magazine May 2007 issue.”

Thanks Nili, I love new recipes!

Ingredients:
2 bunches asparagus
4 T butter
12 oz cavatappi or other short pasta
1 small log soft goat cheese (5 oz), crumbled
2-3 tablespoons snipped fresh chives for garnish

Directions:
Heat oven to 450. Meanwhile, bring a pot of water to a boil. Place asparagus on a large rimmed baking sheet, dot with 1 T butter and season with salt and pepper. Roast until tender, tossing occasionally, 10-15 minutes; cut into 2-inch lengths.

While asparagus is roasting, generously salt boiling water and add pasta and cook until al dente. Set aside 1.5 C pasta water, drain pasta and return to pot. In a medium bowl, combine goat cheese, remaining 3 T butter and 1/2 cup pasta water. Season with salt and pepper and whisk until smooth. Add goat cheese mixture and asparagus to pasta; toss to combine, adding more pasta water if necessary for sauce to coat pasta. Serve garnished with chives.

Be sure to send in your favorite recipe.